Ian "Bernality" M.'s Profile

Five more stars for a no-questions asked return policy (within 90 days) that allows you to check your checking account, realize the folly of your ways, and humbly hand back those nice glasses. Five more for a store manager who's using Yelp correctly. One star to me for falling prey to narcissism and poor prioritizing.

This is one of the few bars in Monterey that actually improved over my time there.

When I first went in, I couldn't stand it. Sure, there's a large outdoor area and live music and cheap beer specials (such as $2 Sierras), but as evening would give way to night the haircuts would get shorter and the attendance large, and suddenly the nice outdoor place to share a few drinks and conversation with friends had given way to a very unruly party. I made it a rule to avoid the place.

Sooner or later, though, those cheap drinks and outdoor seating and the fact that it wasn't the Crown and Anchor *again* began to carry some weight. I still wouldn't recommend this place after sundown that much, as it is usually just a mob scene, but for  casual conversation when available it's a pretty good deal. Plus, they have better bar food than the C&A or the Brit.

I'm curious to come on here and see all these complaints about customer service and the employees because I had a great experience there that was going to be the crux of my review.

Here's the scene: it's Friday night, and early Saturday morning my girlfriend is leaving for her hometown for a week. Only a week, but the longest we've been apart in the nearly nine months we've been together. So we're bummed, which is compounded by the fact that instead of spend that last night together, we're going out to hopefully meet up with a friend who is moving back to his hometown for good (or at least a while), even though from the status at the time it doesn't seem like he's even gonna make it. So we're both a little pissed and agitated and tired as we head out to the bar, and short of cash.

In fact, I only stopped in this place on a lark, to use the ATM. No intention of being a customer other than that. This is about 10:30 on Friday night.

I've pulled my money and my girl is getting hers when the guy behind the counter asks me how my night's going and if I like tequila. I say okay and sure, because my night's not really going that well and I am on my way to get drinks by the glass, not the bottle. He asks if my friend likes tequila, and she does, way more than I do, and the next thing I know he's inviting us behind the counter.

What? You want me to come behind the counter? For what? To try some tequila, he says.

Now for the first time I actually look around at more than the ATM and realize I'm in more than a corner store. I turn one corner and see a pretty good range of wines and some beers in the fridges in the back, and then I'm standing behind the counter looking at hundreds of bottles of nice tequilas.

Turns out, the guy behind the counter is Ed, and he used to run a shop up in Marin and has been here about nine months, and he knows his stuff. He gave us each a shot of something - honestly, I was a little caught up in the moment and don't remember what, but the bottle was over $100 - and told us a little about how tequila is starting to move into a higher-end item, and how he goes on tasting and selecting trips, this and that.

Long story short, Ed was a super-nice guy running a deceptively nice shop for the neighborhood it's in, and he was an absolute angel at a moment that needed one badly. I'll admit to not knowing my tequilas well enough to know how good his prices are and not looking closely at that moment at the rest of his offerings, and to wondering why he's got such a high-end selection in such a low-end place, but I'll be back to tell you more because of how nice this man was to me and my girlfriend for no reason that I could discern. That's the sort of differentiating experience that will make me remember you and go out of my way to send him business in the future.

An average bar, but it gets bonus stars for a couple of reasons: one, it is definitely more of a spot for locals than tourists, and it's my favorite place in Monterey for Monday Night Football, what with the free halftime buffet.

Sweet Jebus, stay the hell away from this place.

Allow me to revise: if you're into waitresses in cliche skimpy uniforms serving piss-poor well drinks to grunts and gangsters, maybe this is for you. If you're looking to maybe get up on stage and take your clothes off, this is for you. But if you have an ounce of dignity in you, I'm inclined to think you'll find the place fit for fools. Sure, they rock some cheap drinks in small plastic cups from time to time, but don't let all that class mislead you - this place is garbage.

I could rarely compel myself to make a run for the border before well into the early AM, when this place reeks of the collective blood alcohol content of the other people in here.And though they were surely there for the same reason as I - it's open late and can offset alcohol - its proximity to the late Club Octane and Doc Rickett's made it a magnet for wasted fools and I often felt like a fight was going to break out. Not to mention those damn bright, flourescent lights and absolutely fugly interior decor. Despite the constraints, though, the staff always kept a smile as they slowly fucked up my order and it was reasonably clean.

So call it a love-hate thing. Taco Bell saved me from hunger pangs on many an occasion, but I always felt a little grimier for the experience.

It's unfortunate that this is the only thing approaching a taqueria in downtown, but the food is pretty good and the value reasonable. Their salsas were tasty, the burritos filling, and their quesadillas are a cleaner, lighter version than what you're probably used to, but it was hard to every eat here without wishing for something a little different. Not bad at all - just not great at all, either.

A convenience store in the middle of an otherwise residential area is indeed a convenience. Valnizza's offers pretty good sandwiches and premade lasagnas and otherwise is either a small grocery store or a large mini-mart.

Because they are the only game in the neighborhood I usually felt their prices were a little extorbitant, but they earn their stars for keeping good hours, always being super kind and friendly people, and being open on weekends to feed me while Randy was out fishing.

Over the two years I lived in Monterey, this place went from my local pub to a place mostly to be avoided. It's definitely one of the better places to go with a crowd of people, as the outside patio is a fun and jovial scene, but good luck to the fellas getting a drink from the outside servers, one in particular. Monterey is a convention down and this being one of the more easily accessed bars in town - being that it's right next to the Marriott - the place was frequently supercrowded. It was fun more often than not, don't get me wrong, but over time the crowds and trouble getting drinks became overwhelming.

Bonus points for the bathroom decor, which was trivia about different nautical terms. For instance, I learned that Hunky Dory comes from a street in Japan where sailors could find ladies of the night.

When i had family in town or other people did, this was always the spot I recommended they check out. It's a little bit out of town - 20 minutes or so up the highway from Monterey proper - but well worth the effort for the results. There are a wide variety of fish and seafood dishes and since the pier is right there you can't beat the freshness. The layout and decor is more cafe style than fine dining, even though something about the place feels nice - maybe that's the cost of your meal, which will likely be about $30 for an entree, drink and tax.